Wednesday, August 8, 2007

The Axeman Speaks 8-07-07


August 7, 2007

The opinions expressed in this column do not necessarily reflect the opinion of Hollywood Jimmy Blaylock, the Webmaster, or anyone else connected with this site. They are mine, and mine alone. If you agree with me, OK, and if you don’t, that’s OK. The fact is, when Axeman speaks, everybody listens, and if you don’t like it, you can kiss the posterior part of my anatomy. Live with it.

Greetings, Axmaniacs! We’ll cut right to the chase this week….

We’ll start with RAW results from Monday night: Vince McMahon returned to RAW and the ratings immediately went up. WHY? I guess it’s because he is such a giant a$# h@1e. Anyway, William Regal won a 20 Man Battle Royal to become the new General Manager of Raw. Regal has as much personality as a prune. Snitsky destroyed Rory McAllister. Jillian Hall defeated Mickie James. Please, Vince, don’t let her sing any more. King Booker defeated Jerry Lawler. It ain’t over between these two. John Cena def. Umaga by DQ. Carlito and Orton came in to give Cena a beating. Umaga turned on them. Umaga & Cena will be partners next week against Carlito & Orton. Unaga is now a babyface?! Oh, by the way, the dating game segment was so stupid I mention it only to say that Santino Marella did turn heel. Like I said last time, it is WWE. Things just get more bizarre every day….

Imagine my surprise and delight when I received a phone call tonight and was told to look at another site and saw an article about a Von Erich. Not just any Von Erich. This is a special Von Erich, Lacey.

Lacey Adkisson is 21 years old and has just signed with WWE, according to a post on another site, and according to an entry on her My Space site. So, my friends, there is once again a Von Erich in wrestling! I predict she will have a much bigger following than her dad (Kerry) or her grandfather (Fritz) ever did. I also sincerely hope the dysfunction and sad history of the Von Erich family does not follow her. You see, she’s special. Why, you ask. Well, she’s GORGEOUS! She obviously did not get her looks from her dad! Good heavens (drool) she’s beautiful!

Needless to say, I wish her much good fortune and much success in her wrestling career. You can bet I will be following her career very, very closely, whether she will be wrestling or whether she will be eye candy.

OK, let’s talk about TNA. Reports abound on the net that TNA will be finalizing plans to go to a two hour format at some point in the fall, probably at the first of October. TNA’s deal with Spike expires at the end of September. I hope TNA pulls it off.

There has also been considerable talk and speculation that TNA will institute a drug testing program at some point in the fall. All I can say about that is it’s about time.

TNA has also signed Adam “Pac Man” Jones. What will he be doing? They didn’t say. Why did they sign him? They didn’t say. Will he be wrestling? I doubt it, because, even though he is currently suspended, it would be a violation of his pro football contract. So just what will this fool be doing? I guess we will find out Thursday on Impact. What was TNA thinking?!

Speaking of Impact, here are match results from last week: Team 3D defeated Chris Harris and Eric Young. Senshi and Christopher Daniels defeated Jay Lethal and Sonjay Dutt. Abyss & Sting defeated Christopher cage & AJ Styles in a ladder match with help from Andrew “Test” Martin.

This week’s humor was sent in by Denise Blaylock: Ever wondered what happens when Hallmark writers are having a bad day....

My tire was thumping.
I thought it was flat.
When I looked at the tire...
I noticed your cat.

Heard your wife left you,
How upset you must be.
But don't fret about it...
She moved in with me.

Looking back over the years
that we've been together,
I can't help but wonder...
"What the hell was I thinking?"

I've always wanted to have
someone to hold, someone to love.
After having met you...
I've changed my mind.
OK, enough of Hallmark writers gone mad, lol....

My next column will be about the sad state of indy wrestling, among other things. Be sure to check out part one of the interview I did recently with Studd posted on my In the Spotlight column. Part two will be up this weekend. There is also an interview I did recently with Snowman posted on the news board.

That’s all for this week. If you have any comments, feedback, criticism, insults, compliments, or whatever, email me at Maybe I will respond. Maybe I won’t. Try me and see!

The Axeman has spoken.

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