Axeman Speaks, 8-23-07

The opinions expressed in this column do not necessarily reflect the opinion of Hollywood Jimmy Blaylock, the Webmaster, or anyone else connected with this site. They are mine, and mine alone. Now, I don't want to appear to be arrogant by saying that, and if I appear to be arrogant, please forgive me. If you agree with me, OK, and if you don’t, that’s OK. Really, I hope I did not offend anyone by saying that. The fact is, when Axeman speaks, everybody listens, and if you don’t like it, you can kiss the posterior part of my anatomy. Oh, never mind, I will delete that from future columns, because I do not want to appear arrogant. Live with it. Maybe that is too strong. Please be tolerant of people with opinions that may or may not agree with yours.

Greetings, friends, enemies, critics, haters, readers all....

I will try very hard to keep this as short as possible. You see, I do not want to appear to be arrogant. You see, Gene and David think I am arrogant. So I must endeavor to project a new image, one of a passive, non-aggressive individual who really has no opinion, otherwise they will think I am being arrogant.

I would like to address David Burcham's mud slinging in his column. You see, he slung all that mud at me, but I just took a bath and washed it all off. Oh, I hope that was not too arrogant.

First of all, David says I do not give credit for the stuff I post. This is not the case, especially lately since Jimmy started Wrestling News Center. I do not give credit if I use something that is emailed to me or given to me by a source who wants to remain anonymous. I hope that did not sound too arrogant.

David is right that I posted my response to Gene on the news board. I did so because Gene posted his tirade on BT's news board. I could have posted it in my column. Oh, woe is me, Burcham thinks I am arrogant. Funny, he didn't criticize Gene for doing the same thing.

David says I come across as if I feel like I am owed something. Oh, I guess that means I am arrogant, oh, the horror of it. What could I possibly be owed? By whom? I would like to collect if I am owed anything, if that is not too arrogant.

Then David starts talking about the "doubts" he has about me. Yep, I guess that means I am arrogant. Oh, what a miserable wretch I must be. I know this may come across as arrogant, but I don't give a rat's ass what he "doubts." He has apparently kept a detailed list of every error I have ever made. Oh my God, that means he has a record of every time I was arrogant! It sounds like maybe he thinks... No, he couldn't think... Well, he has obviously made a list... He has obviously checked it twice... He has a record of every time I have been naughty or nice... Could he possibly be... Oh, tell me he ain't... Well, he's fat enough (not that I am far behind)... Oh NOOOOOOOOOOOOO... I've pissed off Santa! Oh, the misery of it all! I will get lumps of coal in my stocking forever! Oh, no, all because I was arrogant.

Well, since I am arrogant, let me say it this way: Sling all the mud you want to sling. Sling it until you are satisfied. Attack me in every possible forum. I have said it all before, and I say it again. David is a BETTER WRITER than I am. He is a BETTER ANNOUNCER than I am. I admire his accomplishments. He is extremely highly educated. He would have to be, how many years did he go to ICC, maybe ten? He is a very accomplished artist. His work has been published... in a real book! He has bragged about it on this site and everywhere else he could. He was the first writer on this site. He points that out on occasion, too. Although he comes across as a snob and a prissy braggart when he talks about all his accomplishments, he is not arrogant. No, not at all. And in spite of all this, I still like David. I do not know why, and God knows I should not after his mud slinging, but I do like the guy, even if he hates me.

The problem between me and David all started one Friday night at MUWA, when he showed me a picture. I do not even remember who was in the picture. Well, I was in a playful mood, so I slipped it into a trash can. Mind you, I did not hurt the picture in any way. He got it out of the trash can, and did he ever get PISSY! You would have thought I had stolen his supper or something. I had no idea that picture was something sacred to him. He has not forgiven me yet. I was playing around. I meant no offense. I have told him I am sorry on several occasions. Since that night, however, David has disliked me. Oh, well, Santa, I guess I was arrogant.

It is time for the mud slinging to stop.

I know David and Gene wish I would just go away. Well, they will get their wish soon. I have been thinking about getting out for a while. It just is not fun any more. My wife wishes I would get out, too. She is getting tired of me being gone every Friday & Saturday night, and she is tired of all the time I spend sitting in front of the computer typing columns, results, and other stuff for the new news board. She has a point. There is more to life than wrestling. On the grand scale of things, wrestling is last on the list of what is important. I have commitments that I need to honor. When those commitments have been taken care of, and they eventually will be at some point in the future, the Axeman will speak for the last time. I love wrestling, but it just is not fun anymore. Until then... David and Gene, please forgive me... because I know this will sound arrogant... but until then... love me or hate me... you will just have to put up with me.

The Axeman has spoken.